Nurses are a funny bunch. Ninety percent are female and (guessing) three quarters are on their second marriage; the other portion of them are either newlyweds or vehemently single (after being divorced). One in a few hundred are still happily married to their first love.
In observing them (from my desk perch at the nurse's station), I've noticed a few generalities:
1. Nurses tend to want to be needed and enjoy (to a point) having to take care of someone and "fix" them.
2. Nurses pour themselves into their work with little or no return from the patient (emotional or otherwise).
3. Nurses don't like confrontation and learn to be passive-aggressive.
There are always exceptions and, as a whole, a good nursing floor becomes like an extended family where true interaction, conversation, and support happens on a daily basis. After all, we spend 1/3 of our lives together in close proximity and go through life and (yes) alot of "the valley of death" even on the calm floors.
Perhaps, the key to their working relationships is just that, we are forced to work together. Not for the paycheck, but because we have a common goal. If a nurse has a tough patient, we all feel it, we all help, we all listen, whether we like it or not, whether we like them or not.
If you become isolated and withdrawn on a nursing floor, you'll quit, which is a known weak spot and weapon. If someone doesn't help others or carry their load, they become shunned in increasing degrees. Sooner or later, the offender either comes around or quits.
I wonder if the same things happen in marriage; unequal loads lead to isolation which leads to quitting and then divorce.
Sunday, December 6, 2009
Wednesday, December 2, 2009
Yes, you can believe in Santa Claus (still being written).
Why do we lie to our kids?
Why do we play make-believe?
Why do we tell them there is a Santa Claus?
Do we tell them about violence and death? Probably not. A toddler's mind tends to incorporate any problem or threat as a threat to themselves. For example, a violent act on TV is interpreted as a potential violent act to them; after all, it's "happening" only a few feet away from their faces. So, we shield our kids from the truth of violence, war, death, and alot of other things to protect them from trauma.
Do we tell them about the daily struggle for money, food, and shelter? Hopefully not when they're very young. Children are not (with child-labor laws and such) responsible for the financial well-being of the family and, if they cannot affect the family finances, mental stress on the child is pointless and a bit cruel.
If withholding the truth is a lie about reality, then we lie to protect our kids from trauma and things in this world that are beyond their control, but the more appropriate term, I think, is fantasy.
Do we tell them cheaters never prosper? Most of us do. Do we believe it... probably not. Parents teach their children fables to instill morals that don't always jive with what is easy or real life. By the time most kids have gotten into kindergarten, they've figured out the truth. Are they somehow crushed by the truth of the realization that their parents lied to them, or do they see the value in the lesson and continue to teach other children the same? Most fables are idyllic and not realistic.
A fantasy world is idyllic.
Is that a lie?
We tell them things that help them grow.
We tell them things that bring them joy or prevent despair even if they'll find out on their own later in life.
We tell them things that have a moral even if it isn't always true to "real" life.
Will you discourage make-believe and play?
Will you teach your children morals, even if it's a fable?
Will you let Santa get in the way of Christ?
To tell kids there is a Santa is fun make-believe and good imagination.
To tell kids about Santa teaches that there are rewards for being good, even if life says otherwise.
To tell kids about Santa does not preclude Christ unless you let it.
I don't think you have anything to worry about.
Let your children be children until they have to grow up.
I'm sure your girls will be fine women and so will your grand-babies down the road.
Santa will not prevent that any more than the fantasy we let our children live in every day to protect them from the other "realities" all around them.
Why do we play make-believe?
Why do we tell them there is a Santa Claus?
Do we tell them about violence and death? Probably not. A toddler's mind tends to incorporate any problem or threat as a threat to themselves. For example, a violent act on TV is interpreted as a potential violent act to them; after all, it's "happening" only a few feet away from their faces. So, we shield our kids from the truth of violence, war, death, and alot of other things to protect them from trauma.
Do we tell them about the daily struggle for money, food, and shelter? Hopefully not when they're very young. Children are not (with child-labor laws and such) responsible for the financial well-being of the family and, if they cannot affect the family finances, mental stress on the child is pointless and a bit cruel.
If withholding the truth is a lie about reality, then we lie to protect our kids from trauma and things in this world that are beyond their control, but the more appropriate term, I think, is fantasy.
Do we tell them cheaters never prosper? Most of us do. Do we believe it... probably not. Parents teach their children fables to instill morals that don't always jive with what is easy or real life. By the time most kids have gotten into kindergarten, they've figured out the truth. Are they somehow crushed by the truth of the realization that their parents lied to them, or do they see the value in the lesson and continue to teach other children the same? Most fables are idyllic and not realistic.
A fantasy world is idyllic.
Is that a lie?
We tell them things that help them grow.
We tell them things that bring them joy or prevent despair even if they'll find out on their own later in life.
We tell them things that have a moral even if it isn't always true to "real" life.
Will you discourage make-believe and play?
Will you teach your children morals, even if it's a fable?
Will you let Santa get in the way of Christ?
To tell kids there is a Santa is fun make-believe and good imagination.
To tell kids about Santa teaches that there are rewards for being good, even if life says otherwise.
To tell kids about Santa does not preclude Christ unless you let it.
I don't think you have anything to worry about.
Let your children be children until they have to grow up.
I'm sure your girls will be fine women and so will your grand-babies down the road.
Santa will not prevent that any more than the fantasy we let our children live in every day to protect them from the other "realities" all around them.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)