I've watched two dad's give their daughters away in marriage. I've watched two men struggle with paradoxically coexisting emotions of joy and sadness as they walked down the isle. The smiling girl on their arm was both three and twenty, a little girl still waiting up at night to see their dad come home and a grown woman ready to move on with another man.
My wife's uncle Steve was blown away and visibly shaken during his daughter's wedding rehearsal tonight. After walking her down the isle, he sat down in the seat beside me and watched my youngest daughter playing in the grass. I've never seen him so thoughtful. After a few minutes, he turned to me and said, "It all goes by so quick. I wish I had done more with my kids when they were growing up. They're all grown and leaving now. Make sure you get in all you can while they're still young." I agree Steve. I agree. It scares me.
I guess that's why I try to, as a friend once said said, looking back, "say yes more than you say no." When either of my daughters asks to jump on me, play with me, or wants their nails done, I try to see the time that's short. That's why they know, if they persist, I will gladly lay down pride, my lack of sleep, homework, or TV to play some cards, dress the dolls, or wear a funny hat to tea.
Friday, June 11, 2010
Monday, May 10, 2010
Grace at The Table (Speaking Notes)
Thankfully, the table of the Lord is open to ALL who have chosen to accept the gift of God (Mark 16:15), made perfect in our brokenness, as we are, until the second coming of Christ.
So... "come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden" (Matthew 11:28). Come as you are, realizing that there is nothing you can add to His sacrifice to make it more complete, either with nice cloths or good works, nor is there anything you can do that will diminish its worth or potency, either with evil deeds or your absence.
So... come as you are in what ever you are wearing and in the grips of whatever you are doing or have done (2 Corinthians 12:7).
Come all you who are liers, cheaters, alcoholics, and thieves. Come all you womanizers, homosexuals, worriers, murderers, abusers, losers and more. This table is for you and no one more worthy... for no one is more worthy (Romans 3:23).
Come in your Metalica t-shirts. Come in you torn jeans and your ragged cloths. Come in your, as of yet, sinfulness (2 Corinthians 12:9, Philippians 3:12).
This table is not a confessional. In the same way you cannot clean your face with a dirty rag, you cannot clean your soul with sinful hands. You cannot make yourself more worthy. That has already been done by another with hands that, first, washed your feet (1 John 4:19).
We will not and should not hinder you in coming to this table. Come as children (Matthew 18:3), and woe to those who try to stop you from coming or get in your way (Luke 17:1,2).
This table is for you because it is not about you (Genesis 22:8).
Come and remember what He did, its finality and authority. Come and remember what He still does (His grace) and why (His love).
*Taking the bread and cup in turn*
"While they were eating, Jesus took bread, gave thanks and broke it, and gave it to his disciples, saying, 'Take it; this is my body.' Then he took the cup, gave thanks and offered it to them, and they all drank from it. 'This is my blood of the covenant, which is poured out for many,' he said to them.
Mark 14:22-24 (NIV)
“…Do this in remembrance of me.”
Luke 22:19 (NIV)
So... "come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden" (Matthew 11:28). Come as you are, realizing that there is nothing you can add to His sacrifice to make it more complete, either with nice cloths or good works, nor is there anything you can do that will diminish its worth or potency, either with evil deeds or your absence.
So... come as you are in what ever you are wearing and in the grips of whatever you are doing or have done (2 Corinthians 12:7).
Come all you who are liers, cheaters, alcoholics, and thieves. Come all you womanizers, homosexuals, worriers, murderers, abusers, losers and more. This table is for you and no one more worthy... for no one is more worthy (Romans 3:23).
Come in your Metalica t-shirts. Come in you torn jeans and your ragged cloths. Come in your, as of yet, sinfulness (2 Corinthians 12:9, Philippians 3:12).
This table is not a confessional. In the same way you cannot clean your face with a dirty rag, you cannot clean your soul with sinful hands. You cannot make yourself more worthy. That has already been done by another with hands that, first, washed your feet (1 John 4:19).
We will not and should not hinder you in coming to this table. Come as children (Matthew 18:3), and woe to those who try to stop you from coming or get in your way (Luke 17:1,2).
This table is for you because it is not about you (Genesis 22:8).
Come and remember what He did, its finality and authority. Come and remember what He still does (His grace) and why (His love).
*Taking the bread and cup in turn*
"While they were eating, Jesus took bread, gave thanks and broke it, and gave it to his disciples, saying, 'Take it; this is my body.' Then he took the cup, gave thanks and offered it to them, and they all drank from it. 'This is my blood of the covenant, which is poured out for many,' he said to them.
Mark 14:22-24 (NIV)
“…Do this in remembrance of me.”
Luke 22:19 (NIV)
Sunday, April 18, 2010
Grace at The Lord's Table (scratch paper)
Central Ideas:
1. Why are we worthy?
2. Why do we think we are not worthy?
a. A mistaken view of faith & works.
b. Do we have to be perfect to come to this table?
b2. Understand, this is not a table of forgiveness, this is a table of the forgiven (remembrance). Hence, only believing sinners may come.
b3. This is not a confessional booth, this is a table of acknowledgment of our Lord's work, not yours(acknowledgment). Hence, only baptized believing sinners may come.
3. Why do we think others are not worthy?
a. We demonstrate a lack of faith in His way & power. (Paul & David were murderers.)
b. It is not up to us to "know a man's heart."
c. Ultimately, we condemn ourselves. (leave the alter and then come back)
4. Grace at The Lord's Table.
1. Why are we worthy?
2. Why do we think we are not worthy?
a. A mistaken view of faith & works.
b. Do we have to be perfect to come to this table?
b2. Understand, this is not a table of forgiveness, this is a table of the forgiven (remembrance). Hence, only believing sinners may come.
b3. This is not a confessional booth, this is a table of acknowledgment of our Lord's work, not yours(acknowledgment). Hence, only baptized believing sinners may come.
3. Why do we think others are not worthy?
a. We demonstrate a lack of faith in His way & power. (Paul & David were murderers.)
b. It is not up to us to "know a man's heart."
c. Ultimately, we condemn ourselves. (leave the alter and then come back)
4. Grace at The Lord's Table.
Sunday, March 28, 2010
Poem Paragraph in Prose
I'm blessed with lungs that can expel more air than most and trained extensively in the rudimentary controls, I've become adept at being loud. I talk. I charm. I ease. I can yell harm or warning. I can whisper love and sweet nothings, calm from lips. I have become the double edged sword of the tongue, but now is the time to sheath that sword, the time to listen, the time for vulnerable peace in the face of the storm. The bravado that isolates may not be the strength that protects, heals, and allows for growth. Faith, not in the sword, but in the sword maker.
So now I wait, in unfamiliar silent frailty to see the protection of the maker, of me, the future, my gifts, my job, my love.
So now I wait, in unfamiliar silent frailty to see the protection of the maker, of me, the future, my gifts, my job, my love.
Tuesday, March 23, 2010
Do more than Survive.
One would hope that you do more than survive, thrive.
I often wonder why so many people do what they think "ought" to be done instead of what they want to be done? Unless their is a moral/legal imperative against something, why not do it? If you can do something, why not do something that makes you happy?
Perhaps the root lies in our subconscious breeding, a strange mix of the protestant work ethic, Victorian stoicism, and the general working-class idea of life-as-suffering. Although I do believe in a life of some restraint, why be miserable?
That said, I think my camera and a new paintball gun are calling me. After all, it is my day off.
I often wonder why so many people do what they think "ought" to be done instead of what they want to be done? Unless their is a moral/legal imperative against something, why not do it? If you can do something, why not do something that makes you happy?
Perhaps the root lies in our subconscious breeding, a strange mix of the protestant work ethic, Victorian stoicism, and the general working-class idea of life-as-suffering. Although I do believe in a life of some restraint, why be miserable?
That said, I think my camera and a new paintball gun are calling me. After all, it is my day off.
Tuesday, March 16, 2010
What a coincidence!
I should clarify that ALL of these issues were unknown until yesterday morning:
I went downstairs to retrieve a plastic tote for Angel to swap seasonal cloths. While down there, I heard water dripping (never good).
I discovered a very leaky shut-off valve in the hot-water-tank's cold water intake and the valve came apart when I tried to fix it (over 50 years old). I shut off the house's water and went to Home Depot for a replacment valve. With additional muscle (and know-how) from my father-in-law, the valve was replaced and I turned the water back on to the house.
With the water back on, I was watching for leaks and noticed that the gas vent on the water tank was swiss-cheese and had been knocked loose by the earlier pipe-persuasion. CO alert! I'm sure the only thing saving us in the past ten years had been the general draftiness of the basement/house.
While inspecting the damage to the exhaust pipe, I heard a 'snapping" noise and got dripped on as the dish washer kicked into a new cycle. Looking up, I noticed electricity arching to a pipe and water coming through a hole in the floor above me.
A sensor in the dishwasher above my head had given out and was now pouring a few gallons of water into the basement and on to my head. Luckless, or not, it was draining down the power wire and through a hole in the floor instead of into the rest of the kitchen. My earlier electrician/carpenter job was not water proof and ran right by the pipes I had just fixed.
That night, after the whole string of events, I couldn't sleep for some reason. To settle my fears, I walked around the house and checked the various detectors; all of the fire detectors on the ground floor had low batteries and the CO detector... had a dead battery.
Maybe my oldest daughter's malaise has been a coincidence, the strain of a growth spurt. Maybe my own narcoleptic feelings have been from lack of sleep and stress... but maybe not. Whatever the cause, one possibility has hopefully been eliminated.
What a coincidence.
I went downstairs to retrieve a plastic tote for Angel to swap seasonal cloths. While down there, I heard water dripping (never good).
I discovered a very leaky shut-off valve in the hot-water-tank's cold water intake and the valve came apart when I tried to fix it (over 50 years old). I shut off the house's water and went to Home Depot for a replacment valve. With additional muscle (and know-how) from my father-in-law, the valve was replaced and I turned the water back on to the house.
With the water back on, I was watching for leaks and noticed that the gas vent on the water tank was swiss-cheese and had been knocked loose by the earlier pipe-persuasion. CO alert! I'm sure the only thing saving us in the past ten years had been the general draftiness of the basement/house.
While inspecting the damage to the exhaust pipe, I heard a 'snapping" noise and got dripped on as the dish washer kicked into a new cycle. Looking up, I noticed electricity arching to a pipe and water coming through a hole in the floor above me.
A sensor in the dishwasher above my head had given out and was now pouring a few gallons of water into the basement and on to my head. Luckless, or not, it was draining down the power wire and through a hole in the floor instead of into the rest of the kitchen. My earlier electrician/carpenter job was not water proof and ran right by the pipes I had just fixed.
That night, after the whole string of events, I couldn't sleep for some reason. To settle my fears, I walked around the house and checked the various detectors; all of the fire detectors on the ground floor had low batteries and the CO detector... had a dead battery.
Maybe my oldest daughter's malaise has been a coincidence, the strain of a growth spurt. Maybe my own narcoleptic feelings have been from lack of sleep and stress... but maybe not. Whatever the cause, one possibility has hopefully been eliminated.
What a coincidence.
Sunday, December 6, 2009
Nurse's
Nurses are a funny bunch. Ninety percent are female and (guessing) three quarters are on their second marriage; the other portion of them are either newlyweds or vehemently single (after being divorced). One in a few hundred are still happily married to their first love.
In observing them (from my desk perch at the nurse's station), I've noticed a few generalities:
1. Nurses tend to want to be needed and enjoy (to a point) having to take care of someone and "fix" them.
2. Nurses pour themselves into their work with little or no return from the patient (emotional or otherwise).
3. Nurses don't like confrontation and learn to be passive-aggressive.
There are always exceptions and, as a whole, a good nursing floor becomes like an extended family where true interaction, conversation, and support happens on a daily basis. After all, we spend 1/3 of our lives together in close proximity and go through life and (yes) alot of "the valley of death" even on the calm floors.
Perhaps, the key to their working relationships is just that, we are forced to work together. Not for the paycheck, but because we have a common goal. If a nurse has a tough patient, we all feel it, we all help, we all listen, whether we like it or not, whether we like them or not.
If you become isolated and withdrawn on a nursing floor, you'll quit, which is a known weak spot and weapon. If someone doesn't help others or carry their load, they become shunned in increasing degrees. Sooner or later, the offender either comes around or quits.
I wonder if the same things happen in marriage; unequal loads lead to isolation which leads to quitting and then divorce.
In observing them (from my desk perch at the nurse's station), I've noticed a few generalities:
1. Nurses tend to want to be needed and enjoy (to a point) having to take care of someone and "fix" them.
2. Nurses pour themselves into their work with little or no return from the patient (emotional or otherwise).
3. Nurses don't like confrontation and learn to be passive-aggressive.
There are always exceptions and, as a whole, a good nursing floor becomes like an extended family where true interaction, conversation, and support happens on a daily basis. After all, we spend 1/3 of our lives together in close proximity and go through life and (yes) alot of "the valley of death" even on the calm floors.
Perhaps, the key to their working relationships is just that, we are forced to work together. Not for the paycheck, but because we have a common goal. If a nurse has a tough patient, we all feel it, we all help, we all listen, whether we like it or not, whether we like them or not.
If you become isolated and withdrawn on a nursing floor, you'll quit, which is a known weak spot and weapon. If someone doesn't help others or carry their load, they become shunned in increasing degrees. Sooner or later, the offender either comes around or quits.
I wonder if the same things happen in marriage; unequal loads lead to isolation which leads to quitting and then divorce.
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